Serving clients everywhere by phone or skype.
Specializing in marriage and relationships, including sex and intimacy.
Note – I do not currently offer in-person sessions. I help clients everywhere via telephone, skype, whatsapp or your preferred audio platform.
To request a free client information package, email me at email@example.com. Please include your country of residence in your email.
Philosophy and approach
In the fifteen years that I have been seeing clients, my approach has always been informed through my personal experience. My professional philosophy has changed as life has changed me personally.
When I began, I worked within the assumptions and beliefs that many in my field hold: That our wounds need attention, that our way forward is through resolving the past, and that healing is accomplished through hard work.
Today I work differently because I see things differently. Here is a brief outline of my current philosophy and approach:
• You are seeking help because you want to feel good. Feeling good is the foundation. I support this unequivocally.
• Wellbeing and ease are our natural state. We don’t access these through effort, but rather by allowing. I help people understand the difference, and tune into wellbeing and ease through three primary access points or operating systems – sensation, emotion (feeling), and cognition (thinking).
• Each of us creates our own emotional experiences, either by default or by intention. It might seem like emotion is something that happens to us from outside circumstances, but we can fine tune our emotional apparatus so that, with practice, we can create emotional experiences from the inside out, according to our preferences.
• We are eternal, infinite, energetic beings even while we are having our earthly physical experience. Harmonizing these two aspects of self has wonderful benefits of joy and clarity.
If what you’re reading here feels resonant, there’s a very good chance we’ll enjoy our sessions together. I encourage you to trust your instincts as you decide whether to proceed with hiring me.
Background and training
I’ve been in private practice since earning my Hakomi Therapist certification in 2008 upon completion of an accredited three year training and supervision program with lead trainer Beth Falch-Nielsen. Mindful Experiential Therapy Approaches (also known as M.E.T.A.), somatic processing, and trauma therapy were included with the Hakomi curriculum. I also had the good fortune to learn directly from the founder of the Hakomi method, Ron Kurtz, shortly before his passing in 2011.
My additional training as a Co-Active Coach provides a bold, straight-talking counter-balance to the slow and gentle approach of Hakomi. I also draw on complementary modalities and wisdom traditions including archetypal and depth psychology, the enneagram, sexual and erotic energies (tantra, taoist etc), non-violent communication, family systems theory, the teachings of Abraham-Hicks, yoga and Thai yoga massage, and various body-centred somatic mindfulness practices.
The training I’ve done has given me a solid foundation for my work, but frankly it is the insight gained from years of working with couples on their most intimate conflicts and their most persistent relationship issues that has taught me the most.
I work differently from purely cognitive based counsellors and therapists. Rather than just talking about an issue, I help clients get out of their head and explore the feelings that shape their relationship moment to moment. This includes accessing experiences and emotions held in the body and imagination.
Understanding different personality types helps me tailor my counselling services to suit the needs of a variety of clients.
While women are sometimes assumed to be more comfortable with counselling, I’ve worked extensively with men too, developing effective counselling and coaching approaches that align with masculine needs and male experiences.
“Justice offered me a perspective I had never considered, helping me to take responsibility for my part and stepping up to take my place where I belong. Justice’s approach is refreshing. He doesn’t beat around the bush too much, wasting time and energy being too formal. He wants to help you make the adjustments you need.” ~ Andrew B, Canada
Books and writing
I’ve written two relationship books and dozens of articles on relationship topics. My writing has been read by over ten million people in two hundred countries, and has been translated into at least six languages. Articles have been featured in The Huffington Post and Good Men Project.
On a personal note
Some clients are interested in who I am personally and what attracted me to this work. I try to be reasonably transparent about myself, while cautioning them against measuring my life experience against their own.
I’m in my early fifties, have been married twice, and have children. I’ve been in a variety of long term and short term relationships – some conventional, some unconventional.
When my first marriage disintegrated I was in deep emotional pain. A counsellor helped me find my way and also sparked a deep personal interest into the nature of love, sex and relationships. This interest grew into a professional journey that continues today.
I’ve been to counselling/therapy many times over the course of my life and have had experiences with counsellors ranging from wonderful to terrible. I know how important it is to work with a counsellor or therapist that feels right for you.
My professional community of colleagues and mentors is important to me and I continue to meet and consult with them on topical life and work issues. I truly love my work and feel like it’s an honour to be able to share my gifts with so many people all over the world.
“Justice came into my Hakomi training as a ‘natural’ at learning Hakomi. He has the ability to listen deeply, feel into a person’s experience, and to create safety in a relationship – all qualities valued in Hakomi. In learning the method, he was not encumbered with defending other modalities and was able to shift into embracing the use of mindfulness and somatic understanding easily. His warm, playful spirit and ability to think outside the box are also gifts he brings to his clients.” ~ Beth Falch-Nielsen, Certified Hakomi Therapist and Hakomi Trainer, Registered Clinical Counsellor
To schedule an appointment or learn more about counselling services –
Justice Schanfarber, CHT
Phone 778 996-3821
Confidentiality is assured.
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