In this module: Recap and conclusion.
This is the last module of the course, but we’re creating more teachings, planning some live calls, and developing helpful resources to help you use The Gentle Art of Emotional Mastery to enrich your life. This additional material is currently being provided free of charge, and you can get notified when more becomes available by signing up at the bottom of this page.
I’ve been providing coaching and counseling to clients worldwide since 2008. If you want one-on-one help understanding and embodying The Gentle Art of Emotional Mastery in your life, request a client package by email. Learn more at www.JusticeSchanfarber.com
Module links with descriptions –
Module one – Embracing my desire to feel good. My true nature is joy.
Module two – My entire experience is valid, but I only concern myself with the details of that which delights me.
Module three – Three human operating systems: Cognition, sensation, emotion.
Module four – Feeling myself as the creator of my own life experience.
Module five – Being really, really nice to myself and gentle with myself always.
Module six – Three stages of emotional development: Repression, expression, discretion.
Module seven – Recap and conclusion. Links to additional material.
Additional material –
Access all four Guided Embodiment Exercises in one place here.
Is enjoyment the purpose of life? Listen to a provocative discussion of this topic here.
One minute meditations are now live. Get inspired in less time than it takes to check your instagram. Thirty different flavors of nourishment on offer. Snack here.
Full transcript of Module seven:
I’m Justice Schanfarber, and this is module seven, the final module of the gentle art of emotional mastery training course, where you learn to create preferred emotional states, from the inside out, regardless of past history, current circumstances, or other people.
If you’ve enjoyed this course, you can keep going with more teachings, more exercises, live calls and more. I’ll tell you how at the end.
The gentle art of emotional mastery is the ability to create preferred emotional states, from the inside out, regardless of past history, current circumstances, or other people.
First, you have to want to feel good, and you have to feel good about wanting to feel good. Be honest with yourself about this, and keep nudging yourself in this direction.
If you do decide that you care about how you feel, and that how you feel is the most important aspect of your life experience, which it is, then you’ll need to get in the habit of paying attention to how you feel, to being sensitive to how you feel in each moment, and then to shape your experience from the inside out to find a better feeling.
You can do this through your emotional operating system directly when this is available, or you can use sensation (the body) or cognition (the mind) as windows or access points for shaping your emotion.
To use your cognition or thinking operating system, associated with the head, choose thoughts that help create a better feeling experience. Always be reaching for new, better feeling beliefs about everything that matters to you.
To use your sensation or feeling operating system, rooted in the body, focus on finding pleasurable sensations and making subtle adjustments to your breathing or posture, always with the intention of giving yourself a better feeling experience in this moment and the next.
Keep developing more subtle sensitivity to discern how you feel and how you want to feel. Use your sensitivity not to express or process every emotion available to you, but to focus in on how you want to feel and create satisfying expressions mostly of that.
Life offers an infinite selection of possible influences. Use your precious attention to focus on the details only of that which delights you. Allow all else to pass by with little fanfare or attention. This is very different from what most of us have been taught and have been practicing in our lives so far.
Once you decide that you care enough about feeling good that you will stop putting obstacles in your own way, that is, that you will stop using your precious attention in ways that are not immediately satisfying, you will quickly come to realize that being really, really nice to yourself and gentle with yourself always is not just a nice idea, but is a clear, practical vision that will lead and define your life in every moment.
When you decide to be really, really nice to yourself and gentle with yourself always, you won’t entertain thoughts that feel less than good; not for long anyway.
You won’t try to make yourself ignore how you feel or tolerate feeling lousy because you think it will help you achieve something more important. There is nothing more important than feeling good.
You won’t use negative emotion to try to motivate yourself or others. There’s too much downside.
You won’t settle for self-righteousness, or grief, or anger, or validation or justification, or judgement or criticism, or other ways of “feeling good about feeling bad”. None of them can substitute for the real thing.
When you decide to be really, really nice to yourself and gentle with yourself always, you’ll forever be letting yourself off the hook, giving yourself the benefit of the doubt, and being easy on yourself.
At a certain point you don’t even think about forgiving yourself or accepting yourself anymore because those ideas are so far from the self-love, self-satisfaction, and self-enjoyment that are your new normal!
The gentle art of emotional mastery is always a journey, never a destination because you are an ever-expanding being in an ever-expanding universe, always discovering fresh desires and choosing better feeling perspectives.
All of this is your self-creation. You creating your experience from the inside out. But it doesn’t stop there, and this is important. Most of us want to have a say in how the world is created, how it is run, how it is built and managed. We want a voice, an influence in the material outer world as well as the emotional inner world. We want to skillfully shape our relationships and collaborations with other people, not just with ourselves.
The good news is you don’t have to choose, but you do have to get the sequence right if you want to leverage your greatest creative control and power. If you put outer action first, trying to shape others or the world as a way to feel good, it will be hard. It’s OK, you’re wonderfully free to make life as difficult for yourself as you choose. But if you put feeling first, creating your inner wold of emotion directly, regardless of what’s going on “out there”, then the action you take in the material world will be easier, more satisfying, and more effective.
You’ll never stop engaging the world of people and places and things. You’re meant to do this. But you can do it from a place of appreciation and of emotional stability, with confidence and excitement, rather than from a place of worry or upset, believing that things are going wrong and it’s up to you to fix them.
Again, you get to choose. Are you starting to feel this choice that is available to you? Everything in this course, all my words, all my intention, has been about introducing you to the choice that is being revealed, a product of your evolution.
A lot of people are trying to force you into some kind of corner about choosing your next action. There’s a lot of hysteria and urgency out there and a lot of people are buying into it, embodying it, and promoting it.
That’s not at all what I’m doing here. There’s no urgency in this matter of the gentle art of emotional mastery. It’s not a dire situation. The only thing riding on your choice is how you feel, and you get to decide how much that matters to you.
As leading-edge as this course can be for some people, it’s really just the beginning. I’ve been living and teaching these ideas for a few years now, and I can see that this journey has no ceiling, no bottom, no end. It’s infinite, with endless benefits, discoveries, and satisfaction, for anyone who keeps going.
If you’d like more, consider joining my advanced level, all access subscription series, where you can listen to a growing collection of audio teachings like these, more guided embodiment exercises, and monthly live calls where we’ll do some Q&A and some live coaching with people who want to keep building momentum and expanding their leading edge on this path of the gentle art of emotional mastery. Maybe you’ll want to get on to one of these calls with me for a little Q&A and coaching. You’ll also get access to a growing collection of one minute meditations, which are like bite sized guided embodiment exercise that you can do every day.
Subscription is available on a sliding scale, and there are options to suit most people and fit most budgets. To learn more, click the link at the bottom of this page.
I also provide one-on-one coaching and mentoring, and I’ve helped many people use the method and mindset that I teach in this course to improve their lives in innumerable ways, from marriages and relationships, to work and career, to family life, to gaining clarity on just about any topic or issue you can imagine. Email me if you want a client information package. Please include your country of residence. See my home page for more details.
This concludes your gentle art of emotional mastery course, and I hope it’s been as valuable to you as it is to me.
Please share the link for this course with anyone who might benefit. The gentle art of emotional mastery is primarily a self-directed solo journey, but it is more fun with good company.
As always, I wish you all the best. Bye for now.
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