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The World is Not Broken and Neither are You

The world is not broken and neither are you… unless you believe otherwise.

We see the world not as it is, but as we are. Or as we believe we are; belief trumps all.

Your belief is the creative force determining your life experience, your “world”.

You and I might inhabit very different worlds. In fact there are at least 8 billion different experiences of “the world” happening simultaneously right now. Many will overlap in some ways, but all are essentially distinct.

It’s OK, it’s not a problem. It’s not your job to unify or bring together, or even understand all these different experiences.

You can argue about which experience is correct and which is incorrect, you can rally support for your story of the world, and you can try to force others to believe what you believe, but it won’t work.

It won’t work because it can not bring you joy, and only your joyful existence will ultimately satisfy. The essence of who you are is joy, and your joy comes not in proving or justifying or convincing, and especially not in fixing. It can’t. You can find some satisfaction in all of these things, but they will leave a gnawing absence.

It can take some time to realize that your joy, your personal joy, the joy that is self-inspired and can only be fully appreciated by you from the inside-out, is both your deepest desire and also your true nature.

This fact, that your deepest desire is also your true nature, when it lands fully in you, will shock and delight you like nothing else. What you want most, it turns out, is what you already are.

I call it Homecoming.

You can find this Homecoming in any and all aspects of life, but I found it through struggling in relationship. It was this struggle that put me on the path of becoming a relationship therapist over twenty years ago. What a trip it’s been!

Now I’m only interested in teaching Homecoming. All of the other stuff, the techniques and strategies, it’s fine, and there are lots of people teaching it, but I’m interested in working at the leading edge, and my current leading edge is this Homecoming.

If any of this is resonant for you, check out my R3 Relationship Masterclass. You can listen to a free sample here.

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Campbell River Marriage Counselling Justice Schanfarber

I’m a teacher, mentor, and forward-focused therapist helping people understand and befriend themselves completely. Over ten years experience serving clients worldwide. Email justice@justiceschanfarber.com to request a client info package. www.justiceschanfarber.com

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Counselling Articles Sex and Relationship Advice Uncategorized

Are you looking for belonging and worthiness in your relationship?

Belonging and worth in relationship

You belong. You just do. You are worthy. You just are. Your very presence here confirms your worthiness and your belonging. The same energy that birthed this planet, all the planets and stars, indeed the universe… this same energy animates you. You are that.

Many people struggle in their relationships for a feeling of worthiness and belonging, but that’s not where you find the most potent versions. Two people might come together and celebrate their intrinsic belonging and worth with one another (these are the most creative and joyous relationships) but people can not give this to one another in the same way that we discover it in ourselves.

When we remove our focus from trying to obtain a feeling of belonging and worthiness from the other (or provide it to them), and redirect that focus into discovering, affirming, and celebrating it within, then we become ready for the kind of relationship that is abundance rather than scarcity, clarity rather than confusion, satisfaction rather than disappointment. But not everyone is ready for this. If you are, great, enjoy! If you are not, may this message serve as a gentle reminder, an invitation, an idea maybe worth considering.

Follow me on social media for tips, tools, and insights – Facebook | Instagram | Twitter

Like what you’re reading here?
You’ll love my book.
Read the first 10 pages free.

The Re-connection handbook for couples - by Justice Schanfarber - web box2
Campbell River Marriage Counselling Justice Schanfarber

Trying to grow, fix, change, understand or save your marriage? I provide couples therapy, marriage counselling, coaching and mentoring to individuals and couples on the issues that make or break relationships – Sessions by telephone/skype worldwide. Email justice@justiceschanfarber.com to request a client info package. www.JusticeSchanfarber.com

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